Midlife Transitions
The middle of our lives, from approximately 30-60 years old, can bring a range of new challenges, roles and responsibilities. Often people get to a stage where their sense of identity feels like it has shifted and they want to re-evaluate who they are now. There is often a sense of loss associated with these transitions - a loss of options, youth, fertility and even people. You could be feeling a sense of discontent about life, regret at missed opportunities, re-evaluation of old roles and connections. These can come about slowly - a growing awareness that your old life doesn’t seem to fit very well any more. Or, perhaps more commonly, discontent and re-evaluation can be triggered by external events. Some of these might include:
a health event (for example, a heart attack or receiving a new diagnosis) may mean having to change lifestyle and reassess who you are. It may also make you more aware of your own mortality.
a major birthday (e.g. 30 or 50) or maybe something more significant to you (for example, reaching the age at which your mother died).
issues around fertility – the awareness of the end of fertiity can bring a sense of focus or unease around family decision making
children – dealing with them growing up, leaving home and thinking about what your role as a parent means
the loss of fertility and the psychological and physiological challenges and opportunities around the menopause
parents – potentially having to step into a caring role with your parents whilst simultaneously managing other work and family commitments.
bereavement – loss of family or friends and how to make sense and come to terms with the inevitable changes death brings
relationships – this includes bigger events such as separation, divorce or death of a partner. It can also mean a re-evaluation of who you are and what you want from a partner in this new phase of life.
Navigating these changes can be deeply uncomfortable and can make you feel lost, stuck and out of control. Confidence and self-esteem issues can arise when we have lost sight of who we are and what we want. These crises are also a time of reflection and opportunity which can allow a more purposeful life that is aligned with who you are now.
